I’m Bored. Fuck Off.

JUNK WARNING: this post has been edited without changing its content.

I’m still bored, and I’m still pissed.

This is it! I’ve finally run out of things to do, or things that I can do while waiting for the next thing that I can do today. I can’t really do the next thing I’m supposed to do any earlier, because it’s beyond my control.

What to do? Fuck around, I guess. Just like watching Chef at Home. It’s at twelve. Do these freaks at the Food Channel really expect me to stay up late just so i can watch their freaking show? apparently they do, and I’m a big sucker for it. Suck my big brown dick. To top it all off, since I’ve stopped caring for who’s online and who isn’t, except for the people I regularly talk to, since all of them are nowhere to be fucking found. Everyone’s all asleep except poor little old me, the twelve year old lesbian trapped in a man’s body.

You doubt me? Check my plurks.

Can’t play the Playstation. First of all, it’s with the teenage brother. It’s not mine anymore. If I’ll get a PS it’ll either be a PSP or a PS3. Or a Wii. No way am I touching anything less. I’m earning my own money, dammit.

Can’t download any new songs, because radio in this country is shit and has been for the past few years. Besides, I can’t be a pirate anymore. I’m a lawyer for chrissake.

Where the fuck are the intelligent people? They’re probably fucking, while I – am fucking – married.

Boredom is depressing. You get bored when you have no more money to keep you entertained.

I shouldn’t be bored, really. There’s a Books for Less near my place, where Pacific Internet used to be. What a bunch of losers, those Pacific Internet people. They actually believe that people will pay more than twice broadband rates for even crappier dialup Internet service to play some lousy MMORPG on their lousy fucking computers. Oh wait. Some of my friends are MMORPG GMs. At least they got their geekdom to pay off.

Anyway, there’s even another branch at the local SuperCenter and they sell great hardcover books for like at least half the price. Problem is, there’s no money around (all the adults are complaining) and I can’t get any more dough because I can’t say any more without breaking some fucking rule.

The universe is conspiring to keep me poor.

Am I ranting? Good. This week an old friend came by the house because she had to do something about the boylets that she met in Boracay and she’s telling me about how all these foreigners want to go out with her and this white guy with a forty foot sail boat wants to bring her to Thailand with the boat and although I’m a bit jealous and envious at the same time I tell her that she should just clean up her life and my words float in through one ear and go out the other.

Listen to me, I know the shit of which I speak.

I’m getting conservative. Or afraid. Or envious. Whatevs. Maybe these terms all mean the same thing. I know I should be happy that my friend who white guys think is a slut collecting more and more boylets but I’m not. I want girlets of my own just by being footloose and fance free. In the meantime, I’m thinking she can’t live on boylets forever. This isn’t me. I don’t want to be conservative. Fuck that shit. I’m the most liberal asshole I know. Is it because I’m married? I didn’t know becoming a conservative tightass was part of the deal. I know it’s not, but why the fuck is this happening?

shitohshitshitshit.

Did I wear deodorant today? I think I did. Almost passed out at the gym too. How pathetic is that? Can body odor be transmitted through electrons? Why is everyone gone? Do they smell my man-stink through their LCD monitors in sterile cube farms? If today I’m this upset, I seriously wonder what tomorrow will bring.

I’m a guy. I have no excuse to be pissed off. I don’t bleed every month. I don’t get the short end of the stick in a one night stand. I can drink a lot more alcohol than you.

I have a mood and it just swung like a motherfucker.

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