Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

The hardest thing about taking the Bar is looking for work: it simply isn’t there (at least the kind of work that I want to be doing).

This is, of course, not taking into consideration the available job opportunities from business outsourcing companies. See, I have my pride. I did not just slave over four years of law school only to start at an entry-level position in some call center. I did not just waste four good years of my life.  I did not deprive myself of online access for four months just to get something I could’ve done all this time.

No.

This search for gainful employment can be quite stressful. When the prospective employer says jump, you know the drill. This is all prep work – when I get hired, I expect my employer to take over most of my life. I am to be a lemming in the great big machine. After the rigmarole, a period of uncertainty: just because I jumped doesn’t mean the audience is going to applaud. Hence, the stress of not knowing.  Adding to the stress is the fact that I realize that the friends with whom I’ve spent the past four years of my life are going to disappear without active intervention: we’re not compelled to be with each other anymore.

I guess it’s the same with all other professions requiring professional certification. You get temporary work in the meantime. What if you don’t pass the exam? That’s a mighty big piece of egg on one’s face, and one that I’d rather not get.

Anyway, I’m sure I can count on the support of my friends (and batchmates) if misfortune befalls us. We’re a pretty solid bunch of graduates.

We who survived four weeks waited for each other before leaving La Salle. We were the last group to depart, just before the Bedans saw us bumping chests, hugging, and for JC, putting on face paint (regardless of erstwhile affiliation). I’m sure the other batches weren’t as close. The shirts we had made for ourselves helped immensely. I hope the topnotcher comes from our group.

That’ll be one helluva party.

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2 thoughts on “Post-traumatic Stress Disorder”

  1. ya, man, i’d rather wait and do temp work kaysa be forced to resign if i don’t pass. lotsa online writing gigs, dude, my essaywriting gig remember? lemme know. i don’t wanna keep mentioning na nga “barrister” baka di ako pumasa, m thinking of renaming my blog – Annahiliation, whatcha think?

  2. Yup, the anxiety’s almost unbearable–imagine putting our lives on hold for a whole year!– but now it blissfully over. Congratulations, pañero!

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