I’ve been impressed upon by my college friends to dye my hair at least once more before taking the Bar this September. After all, they reason out, once I pass the bar there’ll be no turning back. I shall henceforth be a slave to the corporate world whose life purpose ranks just below that of a Japanese salary man. No offense – the Japanese salary man is such an appropriate example of post apocalyptic homogeneity, or so I’ve been told.
I love my friends. They remember me from a time when everything was, to use a phrase, footloose and fancy-free. La vie boheme, is the refrain heard in Rent. It might as well have been mine too.
Time was when I would march passionately for anything that vaguely resembles authoritarianism. Those who dared impose their will on me were met with large amounts of passive-aggressive behavior. I fashioned myself as a Gandhi-like figure bent on non-violent struggle against those who would dictate societal patterns. So it was that I went through college with my hair the color of every single shade available on the market.
I guess my friends are just trying to reconnect using the image of me that’s most familiar to them. A perfectly human reaction, I should think.
I hate to disappoint my friends, but I’m not changing the color of my hair anytime soon with any hair product that lasts despite a thorough washing (in other words, products that contain bleach and ammonia to bind the dye to my hair). My hair is white, and it is going to stay that way for quite some time. Ever since college ended I have found myself drifting slowly to the right of center.
I am becoming more conservative. I am changing. I can feel it. I’m no longer as tolerant of other people and their beliefs. I’m not as patient of others. I’m not as nice or friendly or talkative or what have you. I scream a lot more. I find myself a much more unpleasant person at the end of the day. That’s the rat race for you. It begins before it even starts. Don’t get me wrong. I like the change that’s going on right now. I feel like I have some form of direction. I can see where my life is going and a reasonable number of steps ahead. Things were not always so linear or clear-cut. There is at least a path to freedom and all that is needed is the willpower and discipline to make it work.
I hate it when I lie through my teeth.